


Sweet Distraction

by godfreyroman



Category: GOT7, JJ Project
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Canon Compliant, Domestic, Hurt/Comfort, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-28
Updated: 2020-01-28
Packaged: 2021-02-27 14:21:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,443
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22448590
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/godfreyroman/pseuds/godfreyroman
Summary: When everything felt like it was going wrong and the world was falling apart; Jinyoung could put a smile on his face. Through anything he was right there by his side, looking out for him. Even when he couldn't explain what was wrong he could always count on him.He wasn't using him as a distraction okay?
Relationships: Im Jaebum | JB/Park Jinyoung
Comments: 7
Kudos: 151





	Sweet Distraction

**Author's Note:**

> It's 2020 and I'm buckling down and going to write at least 5 fics this year! This is the first of several one shots I have planned! I may or may not have my first AU chapter fic out soon so we'll see how that one goes! 
> 
> Some mentions of mental health issues/therapy and just overall feeling down on yourself in this one. Nothing too bad, just some angst and mild reference to comeback staff that happened last year.
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

It wasn’t easy to exactly hide when he was having a hard time. Usually, he could just lock himself in his studio, in a hotel room in whatever city they were in for the day or lay in bed with a good book when he felt like this; but of course, he was hit with it when they were supposed to be working. Practicing and filming, when the weight on his shoulders felt like he couldn’t support it any longer when sleep wouldn't come and food didn’t taste the same. 

The worst thing was that it wasn’t just one little thing but a bunch of little things that added up, building in the back of his head until it was all he could think about. It was hard to pinpoint even with the help of the company therapist who told him it was ‘normal’ and things would go up and down, that life did that. Even with all of the books, he read it wasn’t easy to get out of? Work was a distraction, a good one because he had something else to focus on even when he couldn’t fully be himself he had the rest of them to guide him. To take the lead and distract him when he needed it most, they could always put a smile on his face.

The one thing he noticed was without even asking was how Jinyoung stepped in for him every chance he got, without question. It reminded him of before in pre-debut when they’d met and he had issues with anger and with his parents. How Jinyoung just wordlessly without question stuck by his side and comforted him; during breaks when he’d just want to sit alone and was tired from practice, he’d just be there. He’d sit down next to him and hand him a bottle of water or share an apple with him. Jinyoung seemed to always know when he needed extra help and space.

Jaebeom had come for an extra practice session one of the smaller rooms, he left a couple of lights off maybe so he could even rest or write a little. But writing brought him back to thinking about the noise in his head, how would he write a better song next time? Would it do well? Should he not try anymore? Was that the problem? If he thought about dancing too much he thought about how much he needed to improve, how little movements needed to be sharper and how he should work harder at it. 

The night he was supposed to have off right before the start of promotions he was sitting alone trying to fix something he would never know how to. Accepting yourself and all of your flaws he tried to think about that, that ‘normal’ wasn’t a real thing and he didn’t need to achieve some level of perfection that was impossible to reach. 

He never actually ended up practicing, instead, his body was on autopilot after sitting there for a half-hour. The walk he’d only taken a few times but he probably should have made an effort to take more often. It took a moment before he realized he was in front of Jinyoung’s building already and he would have to be buzzed up. How would he even explain why he is here? Texting was a better option but even then what would he say.

His finger slipped and it had started calling him before he could decide what to do. Cursing but thankful he was alone he put the phone to his ear. It rang twice before it picked up.

“Hi,” Jinyoung answered, he sounded slightly out of breath.

Why did he sound hot even over the phone? Jaebeom cleared his throat. “Hey, Hi.” he toed at the pavement a little. “What are you doing?”

“I finished working out and just got out of the shower” Jinyoung said huffing out another breath. “Why?”

“Home?” Jaebeom asked flinching when the words slipped out of his mouth, he sounded like an idiot, needy too. He was neither and he should have started leaving already.

Jinyoung was quiet for a minute. “Yes. I’m home, yeah,” he said. “Where are you?”

Shaking his head and realizing how his brain was just running a mile a minute again he never should have even come here without thinking. He opened his mouth and didn’t even know what to say, should he lie? If he lied, it could be worse? Jinyoung--”

“Are you downstairs?” Jinyoung suddenly asked. He took the silence for an answer. “Do you want to come up? You don’t have to if you’re busy.”

“I’ll come,” Jaebeom said nodding to himself as his eyes closed. 

Then he was buzzed up, he made his way through the building and up to his floor. His mind kind of went blank until he was in front of his door and was forced to knock. The door opened within seconds and there he was, freshly washed hair and slightly flushed skin. His shirt was sticking to him and the shorts he had on were loose, it took him a moment for him to realize they were his. He was moving aside in seconds so Jaebeom could come in.

His apartment was always simple, clean for the most part but his eyes were drawn to their bookcase that was a constant major piece in his living room. He stood there, remembering how long it had been theirs, how they built it together and how long it had been theirs. Jaebeom didn’t know how long he’d been standing there but it was long enough that Jinyoung’s hand was on his arm rubbing it. He wasn’t even saying anything, he was just standing there with him, his hair was even still dripping a little. 

“You smell nice,” Jaebeom mumbled looking him up and down again. 

Jinyoung smiled a little. “I just took a shower so I better,” he said. 

“I’m sorry for showing up without asking if you-”

“You can show up whenever hungry?” Jinyoung asked his hand sliding down his arm as he moved in the direction of the kitchen.

“No,” Jaebeom said instantly, the idea of food made his stomach turn over. That was the last thing he needed. Jinyoung paused then nodding. “I’m sorry-”

“You don’t need to apologize,” Jinyoung said rubbing his arm again. He still walked into the kitchen and started making tea. 

Jaebeom set his bag on the floor by the door and toed off his shoes running a hand through his long hair as he slipped his beanie off. He felt bad the moment he walked into the kitchen and saw him putting packs of ramen away. Another thing he messed up, he should have just eaten with him. He liked it when they ate together. “Can we talk?” he asked quietly leaning against the wall.

Jinyoung kept himself busy for a moment. “Is it bad?” he asked not turning to look at him. “If it’s about us-”

“We’re fine.” Jaebeom shaking his head. “No, us? We’re fine.” Great, he’d already made him worry about them.

Jinyoung glanced around to look at him, finished what he was doing and fully turned around. “What’s wrong?” he asked.

Jaebeom shook his head running a hand through his hair. “I don’t know. It’s a lot of things,” he said quietly. “I just wanted you to know.” 

“I noticed, off and on for the last few days. It’s worse now.” Jinyoung said looking at him, he understood. “I’m sorry.”

He never talked about it with anyone, he didn’t know _how_ to. Unless it was the company therapist and even then it was hard to put into words, Jinyoung was different. He saw pieces of him long before he ever let anyone see them and of course Jinyoung could see the signs before he ever even said anything. “It’s not about us.” Jaebeom shook his head suddenly seriously. “It’s not, I promise.”

“I don’t worry about us,” Jinyoung said honestly. “We’re kind of infinite.”

Jaebeom smiled then, wanting to roll his eyes at his comment. Yes, they were that. He closed his eyes. “I feel like every day I just wake up, do what I need to so I can survive and then fall asleep and I can’t pick one thing that is the cause of it,” he said quietly. “I blame myself you know that things should be better.”

Jinyoung thought for a moment “Things are good. Everyone is healthy, our families are healthy. We finished the first legs of the tour successfully, we’re okay.” Jinyoung said walking toward him. “I know that doesn’t ease your worries but find solace in the little things, the smallest things can bring light in times of worry.” 

Jinyoung was right, he was always right and knew how to help him. “I hate feeling like this,” Jaebeom whispered to him as he stopped in front of him taking his hand.

“It’s normal. You can’t be happy every day. Whatever you need from me, I’m here. You don’t have to tell me or you can if you want. Your rules, Beom-ah.” Jinyoung whispered squeezing his hand. With his free hand, he reached up and touched Jaebeom’s nose ring making him pull his head away, his cheeks burned just a little. “You change it out didn’t you?”

“It didn’t hurt,” Jaebeom said touching it himself. Jinyoung just hummed nodding but Jaebeom was the one who leaned in and kissed him softly. It wasn’t trying to start anything just short and gentle, he noticed the light it brought to Jinyoung’s eyes that were flecked with worry. He was worried about him, that’s why he normally didn’t say anything but if there was anyone he wanted to tell it was him. He wanted to tell him everything.

They didn’t stay in the kitchen much longer, switching to Jinyoung’s bedroom which was a little messier but not by much, he had a stack of books on his floor by the bed, clothes on a stool by the closet. They were way past the point of caring about the mess but it made him smile when Jinyoung started trying to clean. Fixing the sheets, putting away a couple of new looking scripts that were on the bed as Jaebeom sat down on the bed to watch him. He picked up the towel that was thrown over the bathroom door and ran it through his hair. 

“I’ll give you a warning from now on so you can freak out when I’m not here,” Jaebeom said sipping at Jinyoung’s tea that he’d set down on the bedside table. 

The look he earned from Jinyoung made him smile. “I’m not freaking out. I shouldn’t be messy in the first place. You’re drinking my tea, I could have made you some.” he said with narrow eyes.

“Yours tastes better,” Jaebeom said taking another sip. Jinyoung didn’t stop him instead he started putting the clothes from the stool away as Jaebeom watched him. 

It was oddly comforting to just be in a room with someone, he didn’t know if that would even make sense to anyone but just to not have anyone expecting something of him or needing him even for a little while was comforting. Even just the silence was nice, Jinyoung’s back to him as he lay in his bed, a half hour or so passed and Jaebeom ended up drinking his entire tea.

Only then did he realize that the brand of tea he used wasn’t even Jinyoung’s favorite kind, it was Jaebeom’s. The tea was for him all along wasn’t it? He’d finished putting away the clothes and crawled in bed next to him sitting up against pillows, reaching over him he picked up the book from the bedside table that had a page marked halfway through. Jaebeom turned into him a little, so his head was against Jinyoung’s arm.

“What is this one?” Jaebeom asked quietly.

Jinyoung hummed softly “A brother and sister who are abandoned in a cove in Canada. Hardship and survival as they learn to cope.” Jinyoung said moving his arm so Jaebeom was against his side and Jinyoung could run his fingers through his hair softly. “I’ll read you a chapter if you want.”

“In your actor voice?” Jaebeom teased softly. That earned him a pinch on the neck, “I like it when you read aloud.”

“You like it when you’re in my arms too. Lucky you get the best of both worlds today.” Jinyoung said running his blunt nails against Jaebeom’s scalp. 

He started reading and everything else just faded away. For a while, he was listening to the story but after that, his mind drifted to Jinyoung, how easy it was to just be with him; how it always had been. Without Jinyoung he wondered if he would even be the same person he was, how much they’d grown together. He drifted off wondering how he could ever repay all that Jinyoung did for him.

The night turned into morning all too quickly and hours later he wasn’t used to waking up without cats on top of him or claws into the side of his face, even when Jinyoung could stay over he would often wake up like that. But waking up with fingers gently working out knots in his lower back he could get used to, sunlight streaming through the windows. He moaned under his touch.

Everything smelled like Jinyoung and it didn’t take long for him to remember and realize he was in his bed. Showcase, comeback day. Those ideas came to the forefront of his mind almost immediately but were wiped out when he felt soft lips against his head. 

“We have to be ready in an hour and a half but it takes 20 minutes to get to your place if you need to do anything.” Jinyoung’s voice was wide awake and rested in his ear. “Jaebeom-ah.” he already smelled like mint which means he’d been up for a while. This was nice, waking up just like this he could do forever. 

“I love you.” Jaebeom sighed softly against the pillow, his voice thick with sleep but it was the first words he could form in his mind.

“I love you too,” Jinyoung whispered resting his chin on his shoulder and rubbing his back. “Sleep well?”

Nodding he slid his arm around Jinyoung’s waist and pulled him closer to him. “Much better.” he quietly said. All thanks to him, it didn’t work all the time and using Jinyoung as a distraction wasn’t ever the plan but when he needed him most he was there. He would use him just a little right? He could help him if Jaebeom would just confide in him with words every once in a while.

“We should try to get food before we meet up with everyone,” Jinyoung whispered to him. “Hungry yet?”

Jaebeom turned his head to look at him and opened his eyes a little, he nodded and Jinyoung smiled pushing his hair all the way out of his face, Jinyoung’s hair meanwhile was messy, half curly and fluffy it made him look younger. “Why do you look happy that I’m hungry?” he asked softly.

“You’re happy when you eat.” Jinyoung wouldn’t make direct eye contact, instead, he was playing with Jaebeom’s hair. He liked it long and Jaebeom knew it by the way he never stopped touching it.

“Happy to see me happy?” Jaebeom guessed rubbing his eyes.

“Of course, always,” Jinyoung whispered, it made Jaebeom’s heart skip a beat.

*******

No one asked questions, no one said anything. He wondered if Jinyoung had done something because no one was treating him differently or asking what was wrong. He thought maybe they just didn’t know or suspect anything but he noticed it from the maknaes in the days following. When he was trying to sleep and they were being loud as usual but stopped the moment they saw him, moving their loudness out into the hall. He noticed it in the staff who didn’t push him, not that they were normally pushy they were just more gentle. The way no one asked him what was wrong but instead was just kind.

Jinyoung continued, holding his hand when they were sitting together and even taking the lead when days were worse than others.

During one of their breaks at one of the music shows that started to blur together he was trying to zone out and ignore the people coming in and out of the room and chatter. His eyes found Jinyoung who was talking to Jackson, it was obviously light-hearted and teasing because they were both smiling.

The soulmate card had to be pulled because just as he was looking at him he glanced over and caught his eye before saying something quietly to Jackson, getting up out of the makeup chair and walking over to him. “I was just telling Jackson he’s paying for food tomorrow before the fansign.” he said pleased. “It’s his turn.”

Jaebeom smiled a little. 

Jinyoung pushed his foot so it was against his and their knees were touching. “Checking on me?” Jaebeom asked.

A nod, “Yes.” Jinyoung admitted, he picked on a loose thread on the edge of Jaebeom’s jacket. “Do you want a kiss?”

Jaebeom laughed then, he used the most casual tone with a hint of his satoori accent. It sounded insane, so casual but in front of so many people; Jaebeom was leaning into him he was laughing so hard. It was earning both of them looks from the staff and other members who wanted in on the joke. Jinyoung was just smiling at him, looking as happy as he felt before squeezing his shoulder and then he did it. He grabbed his jaw and kissed him softly on the cheek, just near the edge of his mouth in front of all of the prying eyes in the room.

It only made his heart race as he looked at him in shock, even as Bambam threw a jacket at them. Jinyoung looked so pleased with himself. Even the smallest of things could make him forget his worries for a little while.

At the end of every day during that week of schedules, when they were getting into cars to go back home Jinyoung was surprised when Jaebeom got into his car even when he lived in the opposite direction. The first time it happened Jinyoung even asked him if he was okay or just too tired to know where he was supposed to be going because their apartments weren’t exactly close. 

Nodding at the driver to go he nodded. “My mom’s got the kids it’s fine,” Jaebeom said sitting back in his seat, kids meaning his cats of course but it still left Jinyoung confused looking so Jaebeom just grabbed his hand and squeezed it. 

They ended up alone together aside from the driver and a manager in the front seat, just sitting in silence together. They would get to his place and the first 5 minutes would be awkward for no reason other than Jaebeom didn’t know how to not make it so. They lived together for years but being in Jinyoung’s space wasn’t the same when it was just his own, it made him wonder if Jinyoung felt the same at his place even if he never voiced it aloud. 

He learned Jinyoung’s routine after a couple of days; dinner first which Jaebeom would refuse at first and then steal from Jinyoung halfway through seeing him eat because he was often making things Jaebeom really liked. After that he would read or rest, he was working through a couple of scripts so it was more reading than resting, he’d catch a drama on tv or even clean too which Jaebeom would usually avoid cleaning at all costs until comeback was over because he’d just end up coming home and throwing everything down again anyway. After that, he’d go work out before bed and take a shower after. Jaebeom felt weird following him around like a puppy but at least he was a healthy thing to focus on. 

It was nice, just being in his space and getting to watch him on their downtime. Not that he couldn’t do that when he came over to his place but more than often when Jinyoung came to his place they ended nights with sex. They were way past the point of just needing that from each other, years past it; but he didn’t mind the change. He wondered if Jinyoung missed it?

“Are you not sick of me yet?” Jaebeom asked as Jinyoung was pulling a shirt on after his shower. 

That earned him a smile. “Not yet, give it a couple more days,” Jinyoung said nodding. “You’re staring is getting obvious though.”

The staring was because Jinyoung was only in a thin shirt that was sticking to him and tight boxer briefs which drew his eyes to his legs and ass. There were times he didn’t even know where to look at him when he was like this. His arms? His strong thighs and ass? His chest and shoulders? Jaebeom forced his eyes back to his face. “Will you get sick of me?” he asked wondering. It was fine if he did, he was invading the space that they’d decided on keeping separate. A space that like Jaebeom’s studio was often off limits and just their personal space.

It earned him a smile and sigh, “No.” Jinyoung said sitting down next to him on the bed. “I won’t get sick of you. It’s been over 11 years and I haven’t so you should probably stop asking now.”

Jaebeom leaned into him a little, feeling bold. “Why aren’t we having sex anymore?” he asked. He needed to know if it was his fault if his issues were giving them issues.

“It’s been eight days, not a lifetime. We’ve gone longer and I don’t think it’s appropriate now.” Jinyoung said easily. He didn’t seem to be bothered by this at all, the indifference was clear on his face. He didn’t mind them not having sex anymore?

“Why?” Jaebeom asked looking dead at him. “Why is it not appropriate?”

Jinyoung wouldn’t meet his eyes, instead of looking away from him. Jaebeom could see the questioning was starting to bother him, especially sex questions. “It just isn’t? It really isn’t the time for that. You’re full of questions tonight.” he sounded a little annoyed, after years of knowing him he could hear when the tone of his voice changed. Jaebeom moved back to ay against the head of the bed which then made Jinyoung look at him. 

“I won’t ask anymore then,” Jaebeom said, if he was annoying him he shouldn’t keep taking and on top of that he still probably shouldn’t be there. The constant nagging in the back of his head that he was just bothering him, that he didn’t want him there. That he was a problem.

Staring him down Jinyoung narrowed his eyes a little. “I don’t want you to regret anything about us and if keeping sex out of it while you are going through something will protect that? Then it’s worth it. I’m not willing to risk us over something as stupid as sex.” he said. “I’d hoped you didn’t want that either but if it’s a necessity for you we can arrange something.” He stood up picking up the towel he’d left across the chair.

Jaebeom sat up straighter, he didn’t mean it like that “Jinyoungie-”

“I’m going to go make tea,” Jinyoung mumbled leaving the room without another word.

Well, fuck that took a turn. They were not a transaction, not something they could just throw away. He wasn’t even asking for it but he just had to push and mess things up. He should really leave, he shouldn’t even be here. He was bothering him, cutting into their individual time and now he was upsetting Jinyoung which was the last thing he wanted to do. He got up slowly wondering if he should just get dressed and leave or he should ask first.

Jinyoung would be more pissed if he didn’t even ask.

Making his way back down the hallway and toward the kitchen he found him staring at the kettle, actually watching water boil. 

Clearing his throat a little, “I think I should leave so I’m going to go.” Jaebeom said. It was the best option, he was bothering him now and he didn’t want him there. He knew this would happen if they constantly invaded each other's spaces like this. Jinyoung didn’t even turn around but Jaebeom watched him clutched the marble counter a little tighter. “I think being here is making things worse so I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it in a way of us or hurting us. I think you know I don’t care if we do or we don’t, I just asked why because it’s different when I am here and you are at my place and I wondered why but I really don’t care either way because I’m with you and that’s...it’s the best part.”

He wasn’t a distraction, even if he was trying to use him as one.

Jinyoung turned around to look at him. “If you honestly think you are in the mood and actually up for it, tell me. I’m not turning you down but you’re not in the best headspace for something that would confuse you more or use me as a distraction when we are much more than that.” he met his eyes. “It’s not your fault.”

Of course, he’d figure it out, that he was using him even when he wasn’t directly trying to.

Jaebeom nodded leaning against the counter, mirroring him. “I get that. I know I’m trying to use you. It’s been happening since I started coming here, I just forget all of my obligations. I don’t even want to go home, I can’t sleep without you right now and I’m using you to fix a problem that I shouldn’t be.” he said shaking his head.  
“Is it getting better?” Jinyoung asked his eyes unmoving on him. “Being here with me?”

That was it, he didn’t know. He didn’t know if it was getting better or staying the same. If these thoughts would just go away entirely or fade into the background like they sometimes did. “I’m happier.” Jaebeom could at least say. It at least wasn’t a lie, he was happier around him. He would always feel that way around him.

The kettle started buzzing softly and Jinyoung turned to it taking it off the stove and pouring it into two cups. 

“I’m leaving.” Jaebeom reminded him softly but Jinyoung who had obviously heard him ignored the comment, putting the tea bags in both mugs. He waited as Jinyoung finally turned back to him. 

Leaning back against the counter, he looked back to him and he had that soft gentle look in his eyes. “Come here,” Jinyoung said nodding once.

Raising his eyebrows he slowly made his way toward Jinyoung who once he was close enough grabbed his forearm and pulled him close enough so they were touching entirely. Their noses bumped into each other as Jinyoung kissed him. Warm fingers trailed up Jaebeom’s chest leaving tingling spots wherever he touched; pins and needles running down his spine. As he pulled away Jaebeom was left wanting more just as he always did when Jinyoung took control like this. 

“I love you, I’m sure you know that but I do love you,” Jinyoung whispered against his lips as their foreheads touched. Jaebeom tried to say it back but he stopped him. “I know you think you should leave because you think I’m either going to get annoyed by you or I’m angry with you which I’m not. I would tell you honestly if I was and you forget we’ve spent too many years together where I know you inside and out quite literally so stop thinking it. You can worry about everything else but I’m here, I’m with you and you don’t need to worry about me.”

He could always say the right thing, with his words alone it made Jaebeom let out a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding and his shoulders relax. Not him, he didn’t have to worry about him. The look in his eyes was still there, just soft and gentle but now there was a firmness to it.

“Thank you,” Jaebeom whispered kissing him softly. “For being so consistent. I love you too.”

“You’re not leaving,” Jinyoung whispered kissing him again. Jaebeom shook his head, he definitely wasn’t leaving.

*******

As it neared the end of promotions, the end of trading and non-stop work Jinyoung had somehow convinced Jaebeom to start spending nights at his place again. Abide with Jinyoung being there he helped him fall asleep in his own bed again. Even if it didn’t last long and Jaebeom was up after three hours of sleep writing down lyrics again trying to sort out the voices and words in his head. 

It was Jinyoung who found him awake after a half-hour of being awake for four nights straight and stayed up with him, they sat in bed with Jaebeom writing and a drama running in the background at 4 am with Jinyoung’s head on his shoulder as he forced himself to stay awake for him. Nora was in-between them and she wouldn’t leave either of their sides since they started sleeping at his place again. 

Eventually, the first two nights Jaebeom ended up too distracted to stay writing with the way Jinyoung’s face ended up tucked in his neck, completely passed out asleep. He was too cute for Jaebeom to even think about anything else, every song he’d started to write even one line for was a mushy love song. Jinyoung caught him too, blearily waking up and reading over his shoulder to only laugh at him and pull at him until they were laying down in bed. 

It didn’t take long for him to finally start sleeping full nights again, in his own bed with Jinyoung’s help. 

“I know I’m not supposed to mention you leaving but you’ll let me know when you want to go back to your place right?” Jaebeom asked as he mixed up ramen in the pot. Jinyoung was next to him frying spam as they made dinner together.

They’d just gotten back from Thailand and Jinyoung wanted to keep up the normalcy they had going on.

“I’ll tell you when I want to sleep alone again.” Jinyoung almost rolled his eyes at him.

“I trust you Jinyoung-kun,” Jaebeom whispered kissing his jaw and earning a smile and head shake from him. He was very annoyed with how often he kept that up lately, all of the late-night dramas were getting to him. As they sat down to eat Jinyoung pulled out the script he had been reading and Jaebeom gestured to it. “Have your schedules been finalized for both yet? You got the part right?” He asked

Jinyoung nodded. “Taiwan for most of January.” He said sounding pleased. “It will be fun. I get to use guns like in all the real action films.” He had a glint in his eyes that he got whenever he talked about acting. It was the same look he had when he wrote a song he was proud of. 

His ambition alone could make anyone fall in love with him.

“You’ll miss me.” Jaebeom teased a little. He didn’t even have to hope for this, he just knew he would.

“Probably more than you know but I’ll call you every day. I’ll miss eating with you. I don’t like eating alone.” Jinyoung said a pout in his voice at the end of it. Jaebeom smiled taking another bite of food. “We’ll have to be cheesy and video chat during dinner.”

“Every night?” Jaebeom asked.

Another nod. “Every single night,” Jinyoung said without hesitation.

_You need me as much as I need you, don’t you?_ He thought to himself. The thing was Jinyoung would never admit that he was needy, he would always show you instead. Unlike Jaebeom who would just seek out contact almost constantly when he felt that way just like he was now. 

After dinner, they drifted back to his bedroom. Jinyoung kept rubbing his eyes after spending hours reading, muttering under his breath the words from the script over and over. Jaebeom had finished showering when he found him in bed still reading. “May I suggest giving your brain a break before it explodes?” He asked seeing him rubbing his temples. 

“The steam from the shower helped. I feel like I’ve been reading for a week straight, I read the entire plane ride to Vietnam and then the plane ride to Thailand. Backstage, at home, on every break. We have award season coming up and I have to start on the show script but refresh myself before Taiwan.” Jinyoung laid back shaking his head, he smiled. “It’s a lot of memorizing and reading. I’m fine, I enjoy it.” 

Jaebeom climbed into bed after getting dressed and he grabbed both scripts and the pens he had setting them on the table beside the bed. Kneeling he sat his knees on either side of him, slight shyness hit the moment he did it but he relaxed when Jinyoung looked up at him with that soft lazy smile, his hands falling to his thighs. “You’re trapped. I’m forcing you to relax as you did to me. I must admit, I’m not great at reading out loud.” He whispered leaning down to kiss him. Jinyoung’s hand traveled to his damp hair, growing longer down his neck, while wet it even covered his ears.

“You do fine. Are you going to keep growing it?” Jinyoung whispered pulling him down to kiss him again, a nod and a kiss gave him his answer. “I like it, I want it longer.” He ran his fingers through it.

Jaebeom broke out into a smile, letting him play with his hair and kiss him lazily. “I want to fuck you.” He whispered against his lips. “Okay?”

“More than okay,” Jinyoung mumbled kissing him, pulling on his hair. “All you needed to do was say the words.”

Before he’d asked, he’d asked why they weren’t having sex. Of course, he knew him better than that. Now? He was telling him they were, so he was getting better. 

Warm fingers were pulling at the shirt that was already sticking to his skin from the shower but Jaebeom wanted Jinyoung’s shirt off first. He sat up to take it off pulling it over his head making his hair stick up in the back before he laid back down onto the bed. 

Placing kisses down his jaw and against his collarbone, hearing the soft sounds Jinyoung started to make beneath him pushed him to go lower finding his lips at his left nipple he took it into his mouth feeling him pull at his hair as he licked and sucked at his warm skin. A breathless whisper of his name sends shivers down his spine, he could feel Jinyoung getting harder against his stomach. Jaebeom wanted it to go slow, it had been weeks since they’d last been together. He wanted to remember every moment of this, every touch, every feeling.

“Shirt, take your shirt off.” Jinyoung’s fingers moved to pull on his shirt. He sat up to do so and kissed him again but Jinyoung wasn’t really up for kissing. “Touch me hyung.”

“I will, we have all night,” Jaebeom whispered trying to calm him, to slow things down. He kissed at his neck, letting his hand travel down to pull Jinyoung’s boxer briefs from his hips, to give him a little relief as he pushed up into him.

It was usually Jaebeom that would be more desperate and rushing things but he wanted to take his time now, he made his way back down his body to stroke him slowly, getting him all the way hard now. He watched his face for a brief moment, listening to the soft slurs of his name mixed with ‘hyung’ over and over as they fell from his lips. He made him wait before leaning down to lick him gently hearing him intake air sharply.

“Beom-ah.” Jinyoung gasped, his hands found his hair again pulling on the damp strands.

Before taking him deeper he sat up to grab lube and Jinyoung whined a little. “I’ve already done that, you don’t need to.” Jinyoung ran a hand through his hair and Jaebeom sat back to look at him, his skin was flushed and it only got more pink under his gaze. Wrapping his hand around him he gently started to stroke him again, at a tantalizingly slow pace.

“Already done what?” Jaebeom asked looking at him. “Have you been using toys without my permission? Didn’t we say that was a together thing-“

“Fingers, just my fingers. In the shower daily.” Jinyoung said pushing up into his hand a little, Jaebeom knew how he liked it; how tight, how fast. He was purposely not giving it to him as he thought to himself.

_Fingering himself in the shower?_ Not exactly out of character for him but surely not enough for this. It was different fr him to at least admit it, he’d caught him doing it once but saying it out loud was a whole different story. “That’s not enough for me to not use it. How long have you been fingering yourself again?” Jaebeom asked a small smile on his lips, he ran his thumb over the head of his cock just to hear him gasp out gripping the sheets. “Jinyoungie.”

“A week or more I don’t know!” Jinyoung’s hand found his forearm trying to make him speed up. 

“Not long enough,” Jaebeom whispered shaking his head. “I’m not hurting you.” Jinyoung didn’t seem to hear the last part because he definitely didn’t say it loud enough or even mean to say it out loud at all. Besides he liked the prep anyway, he would do it even if they hadn’t had sex in 3 days let alone 3 weeks. 

The thing was people often thought Jinyoung was quiet but with him he never was, especially like this, he was more vocal in the bedroom than anywhere else. If people thought he was pushy he was twice as pushy in the bedroom; they weren’t wrong about that. Jaebeom kissed and nibbled at his skin as he slipped his fingers inside of him, earning him slurs in his accent as well as ‘hyung’ or ‘Jaebeomie’ whined out loud. He found his prostate easily and watched him fall apart at the seams underneath him

He licked at Jinyoung’s flushed skin where he was leaking onto himself before kissing his jaw and waited until he was begging for more, anything more that he removed his fingers to line himself up and slip comfortably inside of him. He was right, he’d done a good job of fingering himself but the lube helped.

“ _Shit, fuck._ ” Jinyoung gasped as Jaebeom laced their fingers together. 

He was the only one that got to see him like this; so out of his usual composure, his usual put-together self thrown aside for one seeking intense and desperate pleasure. 

Now he wanted to be kissed and his hands were traveling from his hair to his chest to where they were connected, back to his hair as Jaebeom found a pace inside of him. Jaebeom kissed him as he let the pleasure take over groaning softly into his mouth as his fingers reached down to stroke him. 

Jinyoung’s fingers came up lacing through his hair again. “Please don’t stop oh my god.” He whispered against the edge of Jaebeom’s mouth. “So, good. _You’re so good_.” 

Giving him what he wanted Jaebeom gripped him just right, thumbing his fingers over his head as he liked it so much; just to hear the sounds he made as he let go. His fingernails scraping against his scalp as he gripped his hair. It pushed him over the edge, the tight wet heat around his cock and the pulling on his hair. Just the slight bit of pain that came along with it. His head fell into Jinyoung’s neck and his thumb ran over the head of Jinyoung’s cock one more time feeling him shiver in his breathless state against him. 

Jaebeom went to move after a minute but Jinyoung’s knee nudged his hip, he still hadn’t let go of his hair. “Just another minute.” He whispered 

Jaebeom kissed his collarbone softly as there was a meow at the door and scratching on the tile. He smiled against him, his thumb running along his shoulder. “The kids are going to be mad at us.” He whispered.

Half lidded eyes opened “Which ones?” Jinyoung asked with a hum. 

“Cat kids, not the human ones.” Jaebeom teased pinching him. “You can stay in bed. I’ll clean up.” Kissing his shoulder he finally parted them and walked into the bathroom to clean himself up. He caught sight of his hair in the mirror and left it the way it was; a complete mess before going back to him. He was where he left him and he helped him clean up, just as they finished Jinyoung managed to grab his arm and kiss his head.

“Sorry about your hair,” Jinyoung mumbled as he walked over to open the bedroom door and let the three cats that were patiently waiting come inside. 

Walking back to bed, he climbed in next to him. Jinyoung brushed his hair with his fingers trying to fix it a little but it only made Jaebeom smile. He watched him as he moved to rest his head on Jaebeom’s chest near his shoulder. “So that happened.” He said softly after a minute. Nora jumped up on the bed, taking up a spot at the end of it.

“It did.” Jinyoung had a teasing tone in his voice. Jaebeom glanced and saw his eyes were closed. Ridiculously handsome, even like this his skin was sticky from sweat and his hair was pushed back. “Staring doesn’t get you anywhere Beom-ah.

Cheeks burning he smiled. “How do you know I’m staring?” Jaebeom asked.

“I’ve known you for most of my life and you think I still need to have my eyes open to know you’re staring at me?” Jinyoung asked still not opening his eyes. 

Resting his head back he smiled wider, he pushed his arm underneath him and wrapped it around Jinyoung’s waist as his knee knocked into Jaebeom’s calf resting his leg against his. “I’m better, right now.” He said looking at him. He watched his eyes open a little.

“Good days and bad days,” Jinyoung said his fingers found Jaebeom’s that had been resting on his chest, he ran his index finger along the back of his fingers. “We all get them, but I’m happy you’re happy.” He patted his hand over his.

It was quiet for several minutes and Jaebeom started to listen to Jinyoung’s breathing as it evened out. His mind was still too active to calm down. “Are you worried about filming?” He asked him before he fell entirely asleep. Jinyoung’s eyes opened again, and his brow furrowed. 

“What?” He asked confused.

He really did have to ask, “Are you worried about filming out of the country? I mean you haven’t had to travel for it like that before. You could at least go home to your own bed, or a hotel in a town.” Jaebeom said watching as his eyes registered what he was saying and then he closed them again.

“No. Go to sleep,” Jinyoung said very quietly, he sounded like a stubborn kid.

_Liar._ “When you want to talk about it, or if ever you want to talk about it. I’m here, even if I won’t be there with you. I’ll still be here.” Jaebeom whispered instead of asking him again. He noticed his eyes just half-open again before shutting and moving higher up on Jaebeom. Instead of his head on his shoulder, it was on his neck and he was pressed fully naked up against him. His head tucked into his neck, he didn’t say a word as he fit against him. Jaebeom found it better to not say anything when he was in the worst headspace Jinyoung gave him time to get better, he could give him time to talk.

_All the time in the world_.

**Author's Note:**

> Any comments and Kudos are appreciated!  
> I beta myself so please excuse any mishaps.  
> You can find me on [Twitter](https://twitter.com/saltzmans) (I'm also an artist/illustrator!)


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